RANT: Cheryl Cole

So I love Cheryl, she's one of my favourite celebrities. I love her music, fashion, hair... but after seeing her latest video I HATE HER.

(I couldn't find a photo that shows it well enough and to be honest it was getting me even more wound up so settled for above- see video for a better view)

I can't believe how skinny she has got (she was TINY anyway)!!!
Not only does it make me feel scared for all the kids out there who look up to her and the danger she is causing them but its making me jealous too. I know the jealousy is ED but seriously I want to know how she does it and I'm furiously comparing myself to her.

I hate the way celebs/the media can get into my head but worst of all I hate the messages they portray sometimes...

what has the world come to??

RESPECT

I recently read a book about respect; sounds boring but it was actually really useful. I wanted to share a few things with you that I made a note on about respecting yourself, in all areas of your life.

A really nice equation was used in the book to show a simple version of what respect actually means. I've copied it out here:

It comes easily to me to respect other people but I know I don't respect myself very well. In the book there was a list of rights that every person is entitled to, reading through them made me feel quite upset as I know many aren't true for me at the moment but I'm going to work on some of them. I've copied out the list in a simpler and shorter form that I hope will help you to remember that you deserve all of these things......

YOUR RIGHTS:

• to feel like you belong and are an equal
• to figure out what you need and take care of yourself
• to listen to your true/gut feelings
• to speak your mind, change your mind and question the world around you
• to be different from your family and friends, media ideals and images
• to feel and be safe
• to become independent
• to follow your passions and be the real you

A quote I always remind myself of is 'It's OK to not feel OK and it's OK to feel OK'. Feelings are always valid no matter what they are or how they present themselves.

Ellie x

(If you're interested in the book the ISBN is 1575421771 and is written by Courtney Macvinta & Andrea Vander Pluym)

The Help

The Help by Kathryn Stockett is one of my favourite books. Someone reminded me of a quote today said by the character Aibileen that I would like to share with you...

"You is kind, you is smart, you is important"

Who Inspires you? (Part 4) ~Jackie & Gabby

Things are a struggle. When I set this new blog up I was inspired yet I feel like I'm losing myself slightly in some of the posts; I've said what I feel I'm supposed to rather than how I feel. I've been told this is something good to recognise and I'm going to do my best to be more honest on here.
One thing that really has come from the heart though are the blogs about people who have inspired me. Writing about them really does make me feel like there is hope in this world; here are just a couple of my closest inspirations....

Jackie is one of the most amazing people I have ever met. I became friends with Jackie to begin with at school but now I see her each week for counselling. Jackie is so wise and frankly this is something so refreshing; I feel so at ease with her because I feel like she understands me and we can talk about anything and everything together, she has so much life experience and has managed to keep going throughout everything in her life; such strength.
The only word I can use to describe Jackie is 'sparkly' because she is a lovely, bubbly person with such passion, strength and she has a lovely personality.
I'm going to miss her so much when I go to university; I feel so sad even writing this, hopefully we'll be able to keep in contact. She's the greatest!!

Gabby is someone I am always amazed at, she struggles but manages to still conquer things with such grace and strength; this in itself is so inspirational.
I really look up to Gabby; she is such a beautiful, talented and passionate young lady who has such a wide range of interests that I too can relate to. I feel so at ease with her, like we've always been friends and I've loved meeting up with her to have a good old gossip.
I love her to bits!!

Who Inspires you? (Part 3)

Demi Lovato has suffered from anorexia, bulimia, depression, substance abuse and self-harm to name but a few and after being discharged from an inpatient unit is now able to be a positive role model to prove recovery can happen and that there is always light at the end of the tunnel.

There are 1000s of details about the story online but I'd really like to share with you some quotes that I have collected from many her interviews...

"I wish I could tell every young girl with an eating disorder, or who has harmed herself in any way, that she's worthy of life and that her life has meaning. You can overcome and get through anything"

"I don't think there's going to be a day when I don't think about food or my body -recovery doesn't have a day off, I don't think there is a finish line I think you keep going- but I'm living with it, and I wish I could tell young girls to find their safe place and stay with it"

"I don't let anyone's insecurities, emotions, or opinions bother me. I know that if I am happy, that's all that matters to me. And it's okay to be selfish like that sometimes, when it comes to your well-being. Do what makes you happy, and don't care what others think"

"I live my life every day, and if I feel like wearing combat boots one day and shoes the next, I will. I allow myself a lot of freedom and I'm very peaceful now"

"Never be ashamed of what you feel. You have the right to feel any emotion that you want, and to do what makes you happy. That's my life motto."

Demi's new album titled 'Unbroken' is one of the most amazing things I have ever bought; I connect to so much of her new stuff, the lyrics are just spot on- especially the tracks 'Skyscraper', 'Fix a Heart', 'Lightweight'...  some are very emotional and personal (especially For the Love of a Daughter) which I think is such a brave thing to do, sharing emotions with someone is one of the hardest things to do, let alone to the world!
She also made a documentary called 'Stay Strong' that aired on MTV recently. I've checked out all the trailers for it and read so many raving reviews, it's a must watch if you ever get the chance to see it. (I don't get the MTV channel so let me know what the full version is like if you've taken a look!)
Speaking of Stay Strong, Demi actually got these words tattooed over her self harm scars on her wrists displaying such a positive and recovery focused message, one for us all to remember.

Stay Strong xxx

Who Inspires you? (Part 2)

On my last post I wrote briefly about Princess Diana.  I found it fascinating learning someone so well known, beautiful, loved and treasured could go through similar things to any other human being, including myself. It's often so difficult to realise you're not the only one -there are others out there too.



In 1995 Princess Diana first spoke publicly in a BBC interview that she suffered from Bulimia during her marriage to Prince Charles.
"It was my escape mechanism, and it worked for me at that time....it gives you a feeling of comfort"
"I had bulimia for a number of years, and that’s like a secret disease. You inflict it upon yourself because your self-esteem is at low ebb, and you don’t think you’re worthy or valuable. It’s like having a pair of arms around you, but it’s temporarily, temporary....And it’s a repetitive pattern, which is very destructive to yourself,"
When this became public knowledge reported cases of Bulimia skyrocketed, Diana's admission empowered others to come forward and admit their own eating disorder too.

When you think about it I can understand how someone such as Diana developed an illness such as this; she needed (and was expected) to have a picture perfect appearance, constantly hounded by press and was always under scrutiny.
Princess Diana learned to do what many of us do; internalise pain, confusion and feelings; contributing to cutting and later depression- post-natal and clinical. However, at the time of her death in 1997, she not only seemed to have overcome these difficulties but also achieved success in the life she was choosing for herself.

This is why she is a truly inspirational hero.

Who Inspires you? (Part 1)

When times are difficult it's always good to have some people around you or people to think about to encourage, inspire and support you. In no particular order here are just a few of mine...


Jackie W
Gabby W
Laurel F
Demi Lovato
Princess Diana
Angela C
Jesus
Louise Hay
Melly
My Mum, Dad & Lucy, Grandma
Kate Middleton
Lynsey
Peggy


Ok, yes some of them are the typical teenage inspirations but others are those who I admire for their bravery, courage and wisdom (especially the top few girlies). Others are people who have overcome things and I feel encouraged by this, e.g. I didn't even realise Princess Diana suffered from depression and bulimia- although when you think about it it isn't really that surprising. I've mentioned Demi Lovato in the last post who is a lantern of hope and such a positive role model, especially for teen girls.

A lot of these people are just so special to me... sometimes it makes me feel better even thinking about them.


Who would be on your list?

Today Is...

Today is COMPLIMENT YOUR MIRROR DAY.

OK, so this one is massive. Huge. Gigantic.
But maybe instead of shrugging off a compliment or arguing with someone when we hear a compliment we should just say "Thank you for noticing"- compliments are in fact little presents (sure, argue in your head if you need to at first, its all about practice) and once you begin to get the hang of it you may even be able to accept or at least hear what the other person is telling you.



I had no idea about compliment your mirror day but Love is Louder posted it on their facebook page (follow them if you can)! Love is Louder is a campaign spreading the word that "love is louder than any voice that causes pain or brings you down".
I first found out about them when researching into Demi Lovato and her struggles with self harm, bulimia, depression... and her message that Love is Louder than the Pressure to be Perfect. She really is someone who really inspires me- she has such strength and beauty.

Ellie xx